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14 April 2016

Life Lately

Hey Dreamers!
I hope all is well with you all.

I know that I have been absent from here for a couple of weeks - maybe a little less time then I think it's been.... things have been crazy around here. Well... maybe not as much as I think it is... but you know how your mind occasionally warps things to make them feel worse then they really are.

I finally had my first appointment with the VA at the end of March. Me, being who I am, made a list ahead of time of things that I wanted to talk about with the doctor. I also made a list of all my medications, because being a spoonie, there are quite a few and I am liable to forget something if I don't write it down. My nurse and doctor were really impressed. It really pays to be organized. The first appointment went alright, lots of talking and introductions. My doctor is pretty cool, she's an interesting woman. Very quickly she determined that I needed to schedule appointments with the behavioral health counselor, get screened for a TBI (4 years too late), a new optometry appointment, a radiology scan, an x-ray or MRI of my abdomen, some more blood tests.... there were just quite a few things that needed to be done.

This is my daily page inside my bullet journal covering everything that I needed to discuss

Since then I have picked up refills of ALL of my prescriptions (thank god) and had my initial intake with a behavioral health counselor. That word has such a negative connotation.... behavioral health.... especially within the military community. I know that I need to talk to someone.... my anxiety already determined that back in 2014.... and at the beginning of the month I was also diagnosed with depression. I'm supposed to start a group therapy session weekly in May. I don't know how I feel about this new diagnosis.... it makes sense I guess.... but another thing wrong with me? So there is that...... I'm now awaiting yet another medication that I am supposed to take to arrive in the mail, the lady had to talk to my doctor to make sure whatever medication she prescribed to me wouldn't interfere with anything I take for my fibromyalgia.

I have also submitted my paperwork for my handicap placard, now I am just waiting for that to be approved. Speaking of that... my car is finally registered here in the state of NC. It was still under my German registration because there was some stuff that I needed to get done to my car before getting registered. However, things changed when I was pulled over by a police officer on my way to work because he didn't recognize my NATO license plate. Thankfully, I didn't get a ticket.... but it was still a pain in my rear end. 

Yesterday I applied for my NC state drivers license. I figured that it was about time, since I plan on living here for quite a while, and I'm considering changing jobs and working for the county I live in and it's mandatory to have a NC state license. 

I got to meet Lee's bandmates last weekend, which was a total blast. They are nerds like me in their own way, and just super friendly people. I look forward to getting to know them more. They live about an hour away from us, so after I got out of work on Saturday, we drove there with the intent for them to practice, and then we were going to grill steaks and just hang out. They got to practice for a while before Lee got word that he had 24 hour duty on Sunday, so we had to return earlier then anticipated. So on Sunday, I hung out with him while he was on duty, and then picked him up from work on Monday morning and drove him home. Our plans for this coming weekend got screwed up because last minute he had to go out to the field until Sunday, which just kind of added to my feelings of these past two weeks. Gotta love the dumb stuff in the Army. I've come to accept that it happens, sometimes even expect it (like what happened to this weekend), but it doesn't mean that I have to like it. 5.5 years in the Army taught me that. 

shenanigans with his bandmates hat's

Today, I was supposed to enroll in classes that start in early June. I found out that my college accepted all 24 of my transfer credits from my time in the Army, which is a relief. I am scheduled to graduate 19 December 2019 with a Bachelors in Business Administration with a focus in marketing. I can't wait to start school again, the best part is that I get to take classes on base since I am a retiree. This means smaller class sizes, which will help with my anxiety, and it's also in an area that I am familiar with, and amongst other service members. I don't know if I could handle a regular college class size or the way that people look at me. I have to contact my new advisor tomorrow to get some alternate pin number needed to finally register for classes.

I also adjusted my availability hours for work. I went from open availability (minus Monday mornings to take Mem to school) to a more structured availability. Amy is picking up more hours at work, which means I need to make sure I am home more so Mem isn't by himself more often then not. For instance, Amy took a Crisis shift at the hospital tonight (which means she gets like twice the pay because they are understaffed and it's last minute) so it's a good thing I am home to hang out with Mem. He's self sufficient enough if we have to leave him by himself, but we decided to limit how much time that is if at all possible. 

That and honestly, work is stressing me out and burning me out. ATC was stressful, with a high burnout rate, but this is stressful in it's own way. My anxiety isn't really cut out for a high paced customer service type job while spending most of the day on my feet combating my fibromyalgia. It's definitely taking it's toll on me. Don't get me wrong, I really like my job.... but it's burning me out. I've made some awesome friends in certain coworkers, and they're probably the only reason I haven't quit. I've gotten in my groove, so most of my day is kind of spent in a mindless routine that I don't have to think much about. That, and I was really hoping for some kind of administration job when I got out, which I obviously didn't get and I'm not complaining because at least I have a job. I just need something that pays a little bit better and doesn't wear me out as much on a daily basis. 

I've been working on my bullet journals. Yes, that's plural... because I've separated my every day bullet journal, my medical journal, and my blog journal. My every day carry is still housed within my MyDorian TN - it houses my monthly/weekly/daily insert, my scrap journal, a newly added Spring Semester insert for school stuff, and my 2016 yearly book. The other two are in separate, bigger Moleskine notebooks. There will be a walkthrough video and coordinating blog posts coming within the future month for those that are interested.

I think that is enough rambles for now....
don't want to bore you guys with too much of my life.

What have you all been up too lately?



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