There's No Address In The Stars

"I stumbled across your old picture today

I could barely breathe

The moment stopped me cold

Grabbed me like a thief"

You would have been 25 years old today, just a few days older then me. I found this in my photos today and it both made me want to smile and cry at the same time. This one is old, circa 2007.

Looking back now, we would have never imagined that life would turn out this way. I wanted to go see you Wednesday, but other plans got in the way. I'll see you on my Christmas trip. I know you're watching over us all, and your family is always in my thoughts.

I miss you so much brother. It never gets easier. 

For all my fellow dreamers out there: hug your family extra tight today, give them extra love and enjoy the little things. You never know when they won't be there tomorrow. This is one amazing soul that was gone much too soon, but he died doing what he loved most, flying in a helicopter and fighting for his beloved country.

Song: "Address In The Stars" Caitlin and Will

Another year gone

Hello dear friends.

I know we have this conversation twice year for the last 3 years.... and I feel like it's inevitable, but I can't help it.

I want to honor him.

Last Christmas my mother took me to visit his grave again.
It was so pretty, the outpouring of love hasn't ceased, and I felt the need to take my camera.
Something in me needed to take the pictures
For his mother Kim
and for myself.
So I did.

"Its the guts and its the glory, a hundred stripes a hundred stories
It's the pledge of Allegiance on the 4th of July
Its the handwritten letters from home,
its the sleepless nights alone
It's his newborn baby he left with his wife."

"Mr Red White and Blue
Lay down his life
Mr Red White and Blue
For these Stars and Stripes"

"From the fields of Indiana
to the swamps of Louisiana
To the golden coast of Californ'
Uncle Sam's the only family he's got
His purple heartbeat wont stop
and his 18th birthday was the day he was born"

"Mr Red White and Blue
Lay down his life
Mr Red White and Blue
For these Stars and Stripes

Mr Red White and Blue

Pay the ultimate price"

Those are partial lyrics of a song called "Mr. Red, White and Blue" by Coffey Anderson.

Zack was the youngest of four boys, one of many in his family to serve his country. He was always cheerful guy and that cheer would spread from him when he was around. He was always cracking jokes and just fun to be around. We met in NJROTC our Freshman year and spent the rest of our time at high school doing Drill Team and other related activities. He was a good kid. I was happy to know him.

After we graduated, Zack and I, like many of our friends, had enlisted in the US Military. We all went  our separate ways, and I hadn't really kept in contact with Zack. I knew he was in Afghanistan and we started talking again, he went about a year after I did. The news hit me like a ton of bricks the day I found out that he passed away.

When I woke up this morning, Zack's mother had shared a video that his company had made and I made the mistake of watching it right after I woke up. If you watch this vide --> Bravo 4/3 Deployment <-- At 7:13 on the time line, he's the door gunner prepping his gun before they take off. The rest of the video shortly after that was a tribute to Zack and the other four service members that lost their lives in that crash. It's a great video.... I just needed some tissues.

I miss my friend. Every day. He was so young when he died, but the massive outpouring of love from our little town was and still is amazing. They renamed the VFW after him, of which my mother is now a member. There were signs out for him, and the day they brought his body home they drove through the little town, past the high school, where a lot of people were outside. There were firetrucks with flags, the NJROTC cadets that knew him, saluted him while wearing their uniforms, the pictures were beautiful. They then took him to the local cemetery and laid him to rest. The pictures above show just a little bit of the love that we all have for him.

Rest in peace Zack. You are loved and missed, but never forgotten.
SPC Zachary L. Shannon
28 October 1991 - 11 March 2013

"I Love" Sunday's V.62

Hello dearest Dreamers,

Hope this Sunday finds you well.

This week flew by so quickly, I blinked and it was already over!

** I set up my new monthly plan book and started printing pictures for my latest scrap journal! I'm kind of combining Bullet Journaling with the Planner Perfect method and it's actually starting to work well for me within my TN. I'm working on a post for later this week showing you guys what that looks like. I haven't done a video in a long time, so maybe I'll do something like that.

** Molly Girl (and her mother Sarah) came for a visit this past Wednesday and they hung out all day long! It was awesome! Molly was a little grumpy due to teething, but we still love her! Amy grilled out so we had a full house for dinner that night after I got out of work. My coworker even came over and so did Sarah's boyfriend.

** I got to see my favorite old coworker, Kelli and friends for lunch. We met at a Gyro place on the other side of base and I got to meet up with another friend I hadn't seen in a long time.

** We finally went and picked up the free table a family friend gave to us. My boyfriend and I spent the evening painting the table top white and the legs black. This is the table that Amy and I are using for a main workspace in our craft office and where I plan on shooting my videos and taking blog photos. We might just need to sand the top down a little because the chalk finish paint was a little chunky. After we got done painting, I made Lee take a picture with me (we ended up getting paint on each others noses).

** Amy made some Bourbon chicken for dinner based off a new recipe that she found on Facebook. It was super yummy, I'll share that recipe later on this week! I haven't shared a recipe in forever, so it's about time now that we're settled in more.

** Friday was kind of rough for me fibro-wise, but meh. It's life. Amy spent the day while I was at work painting the hutch, two end tables, and two folding tables. Once I got home from work, to make myself feel better, I painted the kitchen table and we did a second coat on the hutch. We've decided that we need to get all of that done before our house warming party this coming Friday.

** My friend Kelli's husband threw her a Medical Retirement party last night, it was quite amusing. Lee (the boyfriend) and I went for a few hours. I showed up early (thanks Army), so I helped with dinner. I got to meet a bunch of people that she works with in our old unit, I made some new friends, and got to hang out with some Air Traffic Controllers for a while. It was definitely much needed to be around my people.

** Today Sarah and Molly girl are here to hang out. We're just hanging out around the house and Sarah and I are supposed to be discussing some photography related stuff because we are really wanting to focus on our photography this year. I did manage to get her set up in her own TN earlier today, so that was exciting.

.: Little Loves :.

|| Painting | Meishka | friends | warm blankets | having curtains | bourbon | Cherry Cola | new friends | Harry Potter Marathon on Freeform this weekend ||

What are you loving from this past week?

"I Love" Sundays v.54

Hello dear friends and readers!!!

Welcome to the first post of 2016!!!!!

** Monday was kind of a boring day.... my parents were at work so my younger brother and I hung out at home watching HGTV all day (although he also napped a bit). I finished packing up my belongings to get ready for my trip on Tuesday back to Fayetteville. That night we went out to a family dinner at our favorite little Irish place, called O'Keefes. I love their fried pickles! yummy!! Mom called them fried tickles at one point and it stuck from that point on! We had a lot of good laughs and it was a  great dinner.

This is from my brother's senior photos back in June of 2015.
It's the most recent family photo I have of us.

** Tuesday was the long drive back to Fayetteville with the husky. I love my family, but I was very glad to get home! My roommate and I arrived back at the same time (she went home to Ohio with her son). We were both super glad to get back!

** The 30th was my last day in the Army. This is a good thing, but it also made me kind of sad! 

**  New Years Eve! The end of 2015! Holy cow, where did the time go?!? I got enrolled at my local VA and was also told about them hiring for some admin people! I just gotta finish my resume and get that turned in! Oh! I also applied for some jobs at other places as well!! There was also THIS post about officially being a retiree fro the US Army. My roommate, her son, and I hung out at the apartment for the evening, watching Friends on Netflix until the ball dropped. We called our families and then went to bed. We're kind of lame AWESOME like that. My kind of people!!!

** I've just been applying for jobs while finishing up the rest of my college application. The school didn't get back to me in time about my transferred credits and my JST transcript, so I don't think I will be starting in January like I had hoped. Like I said, I've applied to several places and am just waiting to hear back. Hopefully I can start school soon though! 

** I went and bought a bed, a frame, and a nightstand today from Ashley furniture and they will be dropped off in a couple weeks. This gives me plenty of time to get my apartment (hopefully done tomorrow) and have a place set up for when my stuff arrives from Germany. The best part is that I made a new friend that works at Staples (went in for a pen and came out with a new friend) and Ashley Furniture (the chick that helped me out). All because of my Harry Potter necklace and Darth Vader shirt!

OH! I also had lunch with a dear friend of mine today! We were in AIT together back in 2011 and ended up stationed together at Bragg right away! I was there when her son was born after deployment and right before I moved to Germany! I missed this chick and her no bullshit attitude. <3 Sam!

Kind of a busy week and I have a lot of stuff going on in my life. 

.: Little Loves:.
|| Family | friends | Dr. Pepper | New friends

Officially Done

Hello friends!

Yesterday was my last day as an Active Duty Service Member and today is my Medical Retirement date. It's really weird to think of now... I am no longer a Soldier... I'm a retiree moving on to college and possibly a job.

As of today I am officially Sergeant McClure!

So here is some back story:

Due to my medical retirement, I was supposed to be promoted on the day I retire (which is today). I'm not entirely sure why people decided this, but obviously I was just going to roll with it. I've been trying to get promoted since the beginning of the year, and it hasn't been easy. My unit sent me to an Infantry promotion board, which wasn't going well from the moment I walked in. I don't care what people say, yes the Army is changing, however it's taking time. These NCO's in charge of the board weren't happy that I was there (I was the only female there), so the contempt for me was evident. Needless to say, I didn't pass the board.

The amazing news though is that they didn't promote me because of my medical retirement, they promoted me because I met all of the promotion requirements. As someone said to me, I am a legit Sergeant! 

You don't know how happy that makes me.

My CSM once told me that he didn't think people going through the Medical Evaluation Board deserve to be promoted. However, someone way up the chain of command disagreed and decided that I deserved to be an NCO, not because of my medical retirement, but because I met the standards.

Just wanted to share the news!

On a side note... I have to go get registered at the local VA clinic. Which is good because I apparently lost my glasses and I need a new pair. There are some other things I need to handle as well with a doctor, to include some new medications!

"I Love" Sundays v.49

Hello friends!

Hope today finds you well!

** Today is my first full day back home in the States! I officially flew home yesterday. My friend Amy picked me up from the airport and I am staying with her until I can find my own place. Hopefully this won't take very long! As much as I love her, I am super ready to have my own space. I do miss my friends already though... I am spending the day with her 12 year old son hanging out watching The Flash cuz she has to work. Mem reminds me of my younger brother sometimes, so it's rather amusing. He didn't used to talk to me this much when I lived here a few years ago, but I guess it helps that it's just me and his mom now, there isn't stepfamily here to get in the way.

I can't wait to see some friends this week. 

** On Wednesday I got my Retirement flag, a certificate of appreciation for my service, my ETS plaque, and my ETS award (my first Army Achievement Medal.... the lowest award you can get.... but that's a different story). I made the plaque myself. All I am missing is the Retirement Certificate, which they said that they are going to mail to me.

** On Thursday (see this post) I spent Thanksgiving with my usual group. I got to take a lot of photos. We also watched the Minion movie. I am thankful for one last get together of everyone in my group! I will definitely miss the heck out of them. However, this isn't "good-bye" but just "see you later". I'll make it a point to see them all again soon.

I managed to get this little gem on Thursday of C and his week old daughter
This is how he tells if she is hungry, if she tries to eat his nose.
Super adorable!!!

** Thursday and Friday saw me filming and editing the rest of my October Daily 2015 series. It takes forever to get these videos posted, but at least they are done. Make sure you check out the corresponding blog posts (the posts are a little back dated, but find me on YouTube and the links are on each week's video). Hopefully the last of the videos will be posted today.

** My truck was accepted for shipping Friday, which was pretty much the last thing on my list of things to do. That was kind of a nightmare! Simply because no one told me to clean my engine block originally (which is why it was denied the first time) and they wanted me to clean places I can't even reach (it took a lot of pressure washing and cleaning wipes to get it all gone). I almost did a happy dance when he told me it was good!

.: Little Loves :.

|| homemade food | Minions | Dr. Pepper | Pink Monster Rehab | blogging | Making YouTube Videos | Mountain Dew Voltage | Cucumbers | Toast | The little things in life ||

What are you loving from this week?

Today is the Day!

Today is the day ya'll

Today is the day that the movers are coming!

This is what packing looked like last week.

I thought my room was a mess then!

I always hate this part of moving, especially in the Army. I know I have a lot of stuff, or at least it seems like I do, but all of my stuff is crammed into one room! My thought process is that if I have to live in this room for however long, I am going to enjoy it, have it decorated like I want it, and have the things that I want in it. I've showed you guys plenty of pictures of my room in the past (especially if you follow my Instagram) so you guys know I have lots of stuff.

This morning is is all packed or organized for the movers to pack the rest of it. It's a little ridiculous in here. I've separated the stuff that needs to be mailed off, the stuff that needs to be taken to the Thrift shop, and the stuff that is going to be hand carried by me onto the airplane. Thankfully I am allowed two checked bags and two carry on bags. This means I have packed a suitcase and a duffle bag to check and a backpack and my camera bag to carry on. My household goods (what the movers are taking) aren't supposed to arrive to the States until the end of January. This is all my stuff (tv, other clothes, xbox, fabric and sewing machine, craft stuff not necessary for December Daily, my big printer, ect). 

Of course, as I start typing this, the movers have arrived. They are German Nationals that made a big deal out of how much stuff I have. I'm somewhere between amused and insulted. They speak English but are only speaking in German at the moment, so I am trying not to pay them too much attention. The moving company in the States was much nicer and friendlier. Oh well.... at least I don't have to move all my stuff, right? And I at least did the hard part and packed the tuff boxes up already. Thats where the majority of the clothes I am not carrying and my office stuff went. I tried to put lose stuff in boxes to make it easier. Oh well.... you can't please everybody.

"I Love" Sunday's v.48

Hey ya'll!

I hope this post finds you guys well!

You guys! It has been one heck of a busy week for me!

** Monday saw me spending pretty much the whole day at one of the Regensburg Hospitals with my friend for her pre-op appointment. She was having a C-section the next day, and this pre-op appointment seemed to take all day (it took over 4 hours!) The language barrier was an issue as well as them needing some more paperwork. The hard part was the super long waits between her talking to the individual appointments. I was there simply to watch Dom and keep him entertained, which was a lot easier then I expected. He was really well behaved for me and even let me carry him. He doesn't let anyone but his parents carry him usually. After that we met up with her husband and K and we went to dinner at our favorite place!

He and I were in this small little waiting room in the maternity ward and he missed his nap for the day.
He randomly likes laying on the floor with his stuffed raccoon.
It was too cute!
P.S. German hospitals are a LOT cleaner then American ones (pretty much all of their establishments are cleaner and are cleaned on a daily basis by cleaning staff) so his mom had no qualms with him laying on the floor. I checked because I know people can be really uptight about that.

** On Tuesday I had to drive to Graf to see Transition. The bad part was I kept getting sent to the wrong offices because I am a special case concerning getting out, so I have to do things a little differently. However, when I finally found the right person, she took pity on me and a process that was supposed to take 3 days only took her 1.5 hours and I finally got my orders! That means I can start getting ready to leave Germany. 

I also got to try a Butter beer Frappucino finally, which wasn't too bad. I tried twice last week at two separate Starbuck's, but each time no one knew how to make it. I finally found someone who knew how to make it! It was yummy! There was a little too much caramel or toffee or something like that for me, but that is just a personal preference.

** The newest addition to my friend's family is finally here and she is cute. She was born on Tuesday and her and mom came home from the hospital on Friday. I can't wait to meet her this week during Thanksgiving.

This is Dom's first time meeting his baby sister.
He's too cute as a new older brother.

** So I spent Wed-Fri doing everything I could to clear everything necessarily on base. This is just a lot of running around to a bunch of different places, there were even some places that I never in-processed when I got here last year.... it's special. I am no longer responsible for any military equipment, which is a huge relief! I also have some super awesome S-1 (personnel actions and paperwork) people who are going out of their way to help me with my award and getting my promotion orders. I need these orders before I go back to get my DD-214 on this coming Wednesday. I think I should have them tomorrow, which is amazing because, again, this process usually takes a while but I am a special case. I also got my car scheduled for shipping this week as well as the appointment for the movers to come pack and ship my household goods. These are both huge weights off my shoulders. 

** Friday night was another round of karaoke. I was supposed to go to Czech this weekend, but due to everything that happened in Paris last weekend, people are hesitant to let us go visit other countries at the moment, this was a bummer... but I still managed to find something to do on my last free weekend. So I actually got up and sang this time. The first time it didn't sound right (my friend Brandi said it was good but you could tell I was nervous), but I decided to get back up and try singing Evanescence (Bring Me To Life) is my go-to song for pretty much anything that involves me singing on the spot. Needless to say, I really rocked that song! I was super excited about that. <--- such a music nerd sometimes.

** So I have already started to pack up everything in my room. I am working on organizing it into several piles: keep, donate, give to friends, and carry on the plane. My household goods won't arrive until the end of January, so I have to bring enough stuff I can live off of until my stuff gets there. ((hopefully I'll have my own house before my stuff shows up)). It looks like a bomb went off in my room! Thankfully K is being awesome and coming to help me pack and organize. She keeps me on track and from procrastinating. Plus I get more done if I have help :) I absolutely hate packing!!!

.: Little Loves:.

|| Dr. Pepper | friends (new and old ones) | Naan | blogging | YouTube | Clearing | Inside Out Thought Bubbles (a game on my tablet) | purging through my belongings ||

Veterans Day 2015

Hey friends.

I just wanted to stop by today and say a quick thank you and Happy Veterans Day

to my brothers and sisters in arms, both past and present.

The above photo was my last unit at Fort Bragg, when I lived in the States.

I love those guys (and girls) and since most of us deployed together

we formed a bond that has lasted even years later

despite most of us being separated.

Today isn't about free meals or whatever else,

and while it's about thanking ALL veterans,

today is not a day to dwell on those that are no longer with you

That's Memorial Day.

Today is meant to focus on those Veterans that are still here

and even more so, those that are still serving.

I also want to say thank you to the families of the Veterans

for all of their support and love

we definitely couldn't do it without you guys.

Hope you all have a wonderful day!

It doesn't ever get easier

If you have been around this blog long, you will have already heard this story. For those of you who don't know, let me tell you a little story. I shared about it back in March.

I joined NJROTC when I was a Freshman in high school because my best friend Lindsay (who was a year ahead of me) had joined already and loved it. In this class I met some of the most amazing people, some of whom I still call friends to this day. In this class, there was a boy named Zack.

Zack and I became friends pretty quickly, it was pretty easy when the only people you hang out with are a select group of people with the same interests as you. We may not have always been best friends, but we were good friends. We went to plenty of drill meets, athletic days, bowling nights, and military balls together. We'd play airsoft together occasionally and were both in similar classes so we worked together.

After we graduated, both Zack and I joined the Army, me as an Air Traffic Controller, him as a Blackhawk mechanic and crew chief. I went to basic shortly after we graduated and he followed a couple of months later. We kind of fell out of touch after that, I was busy with my first unit and then a deployment, but we started talking again once I heard he had deployed to Afghanistan himself. His first unit was Korea, and then he moved on to Hunter Army Airfield in Georgia, we had been pretty close together but never made the drive to see each other.

Then, on 11 March 2013, Zack's helicopter went down while he was in Afghanistan. There were no survivors. I found out through Facebook and it was a roller coaster couple of weeks that followed. My company commander knew what I was going through, he happened to know the pilots of that aircraft. I went home the week before his funeral for my brothers military ball, where I had a moment to honor him (since I couldn't attend his funeral). It hit me like a ton of bricks, all of us really, but it brought a bunch of us together that hadn't talked in quite a while. My mom and brother attended the ceremony the day they brought his body home, my brother saluted the hearse that drove past our high school, and my mom still visits his grave often. I couldn't visit for a few months, but the first time I did, it was hard.

This was his grave site. They were waiting on his headstone to arrive.

Zack was only a couple of days older then me, his birthday was 28 October 1991, and I was born 01 November 1991. He died so young and it breaks my heart again each time I think about it. He would have been 24 years old today. He loved the Army, he loved his country, and he died doing something that he absolutely loved. He is missed every day, always in the back of my mind, but today, he is a little more on the forefront.

Nothing like this every really happens in our small town, so like I said, it hit everyone kind of hard. To honor him, they renamed the VFW in our area in his name.

So here's a drink for you my friend! I know you're watching over us and I look forward to seeing you again some day!

"I Love" Sunday's v.45

Hello friends!

Happy Sunday. How're you today?

** Monday brought me some super happy mail in the form of packages! If you follow my Instagram account, you've already seen the picture.

The halloween stamp was from a third party company on Amazon. The two sets of Halloween Washi were from American Crafts. The States stamp/fest stamp are from Sweet Stamp Shop. From Jet Pens, I got a fountain pen, a thin roll of camera washi tape, a portable stencil, penguin stickers, and some additional Midori brand bands for my inserts.

** Monday and Tuesday were a reprieve from homework (mostly because I was being lazy and didn't want to do it). I just started week 5 of my classes, only 3 weeks left! It's nice seeing the end of my classes in sight!!!!!

** Wednesday came around and I got my Letter of Release from the Army with my retirement date. I'm excited about it, but at the same time it's sad. This is the only thing I have done in my adult life, and it will be a hard transition. It's also shocking to know that all of this will end in 88 days (84 days on Sunday).... just after Christmas and New Years. This means I am now running around like a chicken with my head cut off trying to get everything sorted. I could start terminal leave in December, possibly the middle of November, so there is a lot that I need to get done first. I want to see some Christmas markets before I leave, take a few more day trips, get some more photos. 

My boss told me I am no longer on the work schedule so I can focus on getting my act together and out of this place. This is kind of exciting.

Random military meme- that just happens to be the story of my life!!

** Thursday was the Hispanic Heritage Observance Celebration on base. I was in charge of decorating the room and stayed to take pictures of the entire event, that was put on by my unit. I don't know how we got put in charge of it, but we were, and I was asked to volunteer for it, so I did. 

** Friday, I had to work for a little while but was released early when the flights were all cancelled due to weather.

** Yesterday was a simple day, just hung out in my room reading and watching television. Once I helped K put some batteries in a plastic pumpkin from the PX, I filmed the video of my current planner set-up, which should be up on my channel sometime today. I really do love Halloween, so there were quite a few decorations.  

** Today we went to another Medieval Fest, it was about an hour away from home. There will of course be a blog post this week (hopefully tomorrow) to share more about what happened (it just depends on if I can get the pictures edited tonight before my homework is due.)

.: Little Loves :.

||  Snickers Ice Cream Bars | Trolli gummy hamburger candy | the taste of Freedommmmmmmmmm | Criminal Minds (the new season has started and I am stoked!) | Halloween themed decorations | Punk goes Pop music (Rock bands sing Pop songs) ||

What are you loving from this week?

"I Love" Sunday's v.38

Hello friends. I once again accidentally skipped a day in my "I Love" Series.... but work is all over the place with my schedule.... so I am a little scatterbrained lately.

** I shared a mini series about the monthly plan book method that I use for my Travelers Notebook! If you missed those posts, here is Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, and Part 4.

** Today is the last day of Ali Edward's Week In The Life project. I managed to participate and document each day with pictures on Instagram as well as in my plan book. I am still waiting for my kit to arrive, so I took pictures and made notes for each one! This is my first year participating in the project and I thought it was rather fun. On Monday, I kind of forgot to take pictures (other then 2), but I remembered Tuesday and spent more time documenting my weekly life!

** I started my YouTube channel! It took me about 2 whole days to get the darn things uploaded, but they're there now!

** Finished my last piece of ACAP and am now set for when I leave the Army! Which is fantastic because I have to drive 1 hour each direction to get to the building... so no more of those trips until I leave the Army!!!

** The IGGPPCamp started on the 13th and has carried over into this week (it ended on Wednesday). Each day they shared a lot of awesome recipes, crafts, challenges, fitness stuff.... it was just awesome! This was my first year participating and I am glad that I did. I have started working on a scarf (from this tutorial) and I wrote down some recipes and other fun stuff to do when I have more time (and a clean kitchen). I look forward to participating again next year!

**  I finally got around to using my Canon Selphy CP910! And it's AWESOME!!!! Haha. The hardest part was combining photos to print several at one time. Thankfully, I have collage apps on my phone that helped with that problem! I love that I can print photos from my phone!

** Went out to dinner with my friends again last night, once I found out I was off until Monday night (stupid new shifts mean I don't go to work until 10pm this entire rotation). We went to the same awesome restaurant called Stella's that we went to for a friends going away party a couple of weeks ago. I had the same awesome food too!

.: Little Loves :.

|| Eureka (the show) | Dr. Pepper | Raspberry iced tea | internet | Naan | new music | NCIS | Nutty Bars | sleeping (at least a little bit) | Talking to my friend Samuel | documenting life ||

What are you loving from this past week?